I DARE YOu
by Zamael
Summary: Calliope loved games too, though obviously nowhere near as much as her brother did. She loved to play even with him. And she loved to dare him, or do dares for him, and loved how annoyed he was whenever she passed something he would not have thought her to. But there is a limit to all, and there was a time her brother really pushed those limits.
1. Opening Move

uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

UU: i sUppose congratUlations are in order.

UU: typically yoUr "gifts" are far from sUbtle, intelligent, or matUre, bUt i'll be bUggered if this one isn't at least sUbtle enoUgh to have me flabbergasted.

UU: the jUry is still oUt whether it is any more of the other two, thoUgh.

UU: i figUred yoU might once again feel a smidgen of Upset about losing another game.

UU: knight to a6.

UU: yoU really shoUldn't! ^u^

UU: yoU did better this time than many others. i coUld even say yoU're developing! even if very, very slowly.

UU: regardless, this does not seem like the Usual sort of way yoU would express yoUr frUstration.

UU: i feel slightly ashamed of asking clarification to the matter, but perhaps yoU coUld provide me with some?

uranianUmbra [UU] ceased cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

She closed the window and turned her attention to the item, drawing it to her hands from the modus where her brother had placed it for her. It was an old, rusty saw, by her estimation far too dull to really cut through anything meaningful. It really did puzzle her: most of the time she would find unpleasant notes or something else incredibly disgusting or smelly in her sylladex, but this thing was neither. There were even no insults drawn on it.

Calliope was worried. By her account, she understood her brother reasonably well: whenever he pulled off a more confusing antic such as this, it generally meant that he was up to something, and she sure would have wanted to know what. Unfortunately, she did not know where to even start with this one.

Probably just another of his shitty twists.

* * *

undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

uu: WELL. LOOK WHO'S BEING SO CLEVER NOW.

uu: WOuLD YOu LIKE TO LEARN MORE ABOuT THE HuMAN TOOL. AND WHAT IT IS uSED IN?

uu: IT'S A FuCKING SAW. IT'S uSED TO CuT THINGS. LIKE YOuR JuJu BOX. WHICH IF IT WERE BIGGER WOuLD PROBABLY CONTAIN A HuMAN BITCH.

uu: I SAW HOW THEY SAWED ONE IN HALF ONCE. AND OPENED THE JuJu BOX TO SHOW uS THE BITCH'S HuMAN INNARDS. IT WAS... AMAZING.

uu: THE TROLLS CALL IT "TOOTHED TWEETBEAST-HOME DECAPITATOR."

uu: THIS ONE IS IN PARTICuLARLY SHITTY CONDITION. IT WON'T SAW SHIT. NOT EVEN YOuR uGLY FACE.

uu: WAS THIS EXPOSITION WALL INFORMATIVE AND EDuCATIONAL? tumut

uu: I CAN'T BELIEVE YOu DON'T EVEN KNOW THIS MuCH. EVEN THOuGH YOu CLAIM TO BE A FAN OF THESE DISGuSTING BEINGS.

uu: YOu REALLY SuCK FAR MORE THAN I HAD EVER THOuGHT.

uu: AND FOR THE RECORD.

uu:LOSING THE GAME HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS.

uu: I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOuT THIS FOR A WHILE.

uu: KING TO C8.

undyingUmbrage [uu] ceased jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

Calliope rubbed her forehead. She really had kind of walked into that one.

uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

UU: thank yoU for that edUcational leaflet, brother.

UU: bUt i do in fact know what a saw is in general, and what they are Used to. and yoU know i know.

UU: i would jUst like to know what this saw, specifically, is doing in my sylladex.

UU: also, qUeen to b8. checkmate!

UU: if yoU look closely, yoU coUld have stretched the match by another roUnd before my win. if yoU find oUt how, perhaps the next time yoU will do even better?

uranianUmbra [UU] ceased cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

* * *

Though it did worry her for a little longer, the saw and the discussion with her brother left Calliope's mind in a reasonably short notice, or at least settled themselves on the back seat as she passed the time talking to the humans, some trolls, and drawing. Indeed, she even managed to feel at ease once again, after a rather long time of not doing so, at least to this extent. Her concerns briefly forgotten, Calliope went to sleep with a relative ease of mind.

Upon waking, it added a bit to her confusion that there was no mess whatsoever in her side of the room. Indeed, he had himself went to sleep without tossing so much as a piece of candy to her side, an event more rare than she might have wished, especially when he had lost in a game. (He still hadn't made the be- that is to say sarswapagus, though.)

There was, however, a message waiting for her.

undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

uu: MOTHERFuCKING. WILL YOu JuST LISTEN TO uOURSELF WHINING AND BEGGING FOR AN EXPLANATION?

uu: I HAVE IN MY LIMITED SuPPLY OF MERCY GIVEN YOu A CHANCE TO FIGHT AGAINST THE INEVITABLE.

uu: BuT YOu'D RATHER LOSE THE CHANCE WITH ALL THIS BuLLSHIT.

uu: KIDDING. I ACTuALLY JuST WANT TO PLAY A GAME.

uu: OTHER GAME THAN CHESS. ALL THE DAMN TIME.

uu: ACTuALLY THIS ONE IS CLOSER TO A DARE. BuT IT WILL STILL BE FuN.

uu: I DARE YOu.

uu: I COuLD'VE KILLED YOu ALREADY. BuT THAT WOuLDN'T HAVE BEEN FuN AT ALL. OR AT LEAST NOT AS FuN AS WATCHING YOu PATHETICALLY WHINE AND PISS YOuRSELF FOR A WHILE BEFORE I DO IT.

uu: YOu'RE AN OBNOXIOuS COWARDLY LITTLE SHIT AND YOu KNOW IT. SO LET'S GIVE YOu A CHANCE TO STOP BEING A COWARD AND ACTuALLY STEAL VICTORY AWAY FROM ME.

uu: LIKE THAT'LL EVER HAPPEN. HAA HAA HAA.

uu: SO JuST KNOW THAT IF YOU WON'T. THEN I FuCKING DEFINITELY WILL GO FOR IT. BECAuSE I AM NOT A COWARD.

uu: WE'VE BEEN IN THIS SHITE LONG ENOuGH. EITHER I WILL GO TO SBuRB. OR YOu WILL.

uu: BuT NOT BOTH.

uu: LIVE OR DIE.

uu: MAKE YOuR CHOICE.

undyingUmbrage [uu] ceased jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

Calliope was pretty clever. By her own account, probably smarter than her brother, who was fairly intelligent as well - in his own, incredibly childish and sadistic way. So it did not take her that long to figure out what the deal was. She looked at the unbreakable chain, the juju charm holding it to the wall, and the shackle holding it to her foot.

She knew what he meant. She realized what he was threatening. It was a pretty new reach by his standards, a couple ladders higher from his other dares and suggestions.

uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

UU: i apologise, but as mUch as i enjoy the thoUght of annoying yoU by going ahead and doing what yoU think i never would, i'm going to have to pass on this one.

UU: it is an interesting sUggestion, but nothing in this world woUld ever make it worth it.

UU: and, really, not that mUch of a game if you ask me. we both do love games, bUt this... ehh.

UU: i think yoU can agree on that as well, so there.

UU: and as far as jeering me and trying to bring me down goes, i mUst say that yoUr Unpleasant notes were rather more effective. which is to say, not at all.

UU: now, woUld yoU like another game of chess? i'll let yoU play as white this time aroUnd.

uranianUmbra [UU] ceased cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

Her brother did have far less common sense than she did, and was typically the far more daring and active one, but quite frankly she knew that in this instance she would have nothing to fear. Even he was not that stupid. So, she laughed it off.

* * *

Then, that morning, she woke up with a start and a gasp as she felt a powerful, stinging pain at her right foot, right above the shackle.

"Oww..."

Making contact to it with her hand made her wince, but touching it was enough to leave her fingers wet with something. Of the same color than her pants and her hand. Lime green, fresh, and warm. Not being given enough time to coagulate. Around it, more of the same, but red, older and caked, that peeled away easily when scratched.

Rolling her tongue over her teeth discovered a strong taste of iron. Her eyes widened open in shock.

Further examination found holes in the fabric, and under them, deep bite-marks into the green flesh, still bleeding. The marks matched her teeth: she did not even need to compare them to know this for a fact.

Calliope had gotten used to her brother's threats and scare-tactics, and typically they did not bother her in the slightest, the sort of a rational person she was. But they had never involved actual physical harm, what with them sharing a body making that sort of a thing rather tricky: this was the very first of its kind. And as much as she hated to admit it even to herself, it worked. Even if she knew he would never be insane enough to actually go through it, even though he was just trying to get under her skin, even though she did not wish to give him the satisfaction, the cold grip of dread creeped within her heart before she could shake it away.

Upon closer reflection, it was not even that deep of a wound. Barely a scratch, nothing that would not heal within few days - provided she took care of it and her brother did not mess with it any more - but her mind did not agree with the rationalization, and insisted on providing much more pain than might have been necessary to signal the amount of damage. And of course, the heart likewise rebelled, as stated.

It made it rather difficult to move: limping to her side of the room was slower than it would normally be, and her face grimaced in pain with every step. He had messaged her. She ignored it, giving precedence to instead clean and tie up the wound: it was her first instinct, even if she knew that it probably would not stop her brother, should he feel like it at all. The process took upwards of twenty minutes, and only when the foot was sanitized (which stung a little more) and covered in snug gauze, did she humor him by opening the log.

undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

uu: OH BuT RIGHT NOW I'M JuST A LITTLE TIRED OF CHESS. WHY NOT HAVE A BREAK AND PLAY SOMETHING ELSE INSTEAD?

uu: SO I THINK.

uu: I MuST INSIST.

uu: IT DOESN'T SEEM LIKE YOu'RE TAKING ME VERY SERIOuSLY RIGHT NOW. DON'T YOu KNOW HOW MuCH I LOVE GAMES?

uu: ESPECIALLY GAMES LIKE THESE.

uu: AND YES. IT IS. A FuCKING GAME.

uu: NO MATTER WHAT YOu SAY.

uu: I THINK THIS'LL BE FuCKING EXCITING AND DEFINITELY WORTH OuR TIME. THERE WILL BE REWARDS.

uu: IMAGINE MY JuJu. IN YOuR FILTHY uGLY HANDS.

uu: BECAuSE I'M IMAGINING YOuRS. IN MINE.

uu: IN FACT. I THINK I'M GOING TO HAVE TO TAKE A LITTLE BITE. JuST TO CONVINCE YOu THAT I'M NOT BLuFFING WHEN IT COMES TO MOTHERFuCKING GAMES. ESPECIALLY MuRDERPuZZLES.

uu: YOu MAY FEEL A LITTLE STING WHEN YOu WAKE uP. DON'T WORRY. IT'S NOTHING BIG. YET.

uu: HAA HAA! HEE HEE!

undyingUmbrage [uu] ceased jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

Calliope did not respond immediately. For one, she was considering just how much, and what parts, was an act, or a shitty twist and meant actually something entirely different. Just what did this particular game entail, in reality?

For other, her hands were shaking.

Okay. She had to calm down. It was not as bad as it may have looked: he wouldn't go for it. He had said nothing, or done nothing, that would convince her of it any more than she had thought about it before. He was just biting her to mess her up. Him wanting to mess her up was nothing new, and she was probably as safe as ever.

She responded, trying to make herself sound more calm than she really was.

uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

UU: i'm not impressed.

UU: well, actUally i am, a little. becaUse this is an entirely new low yoU have reached. i didn't think yoU had it in yoU. well done.

UU: bUt yoU are barking mad if yoU think yoU have me scared by nibbling me a bit. yoU'll have to do better than that!

UU: bUt yes. if yoU want to play, let's play. i'll take a pUnt on that yoU won't chew off yoUr own leg. even yoU are not that kind of a git.

UU: it really woUld break some of the rUles of the other games we are playing at the moment, no? yoU have told me yoU take rUles very serioUsly.

UU: also, yoUr hands are filthy and Ugly? :U

UU: actUally, now that we are on the sUbject... how mUch does it make sense that yoU call me Ugly and hideoUs and all those other hUrtful words, when we share a body?

UU: so yoU are basically also insUlting yoUrself.

UU: game on. cheers!

uranianUmbra [UU] ceased cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

That last bit was something of a stretch, and she thought she could usually come up with better taunts, but she just had to end it in a positive note, and did not feel like spending much time to come up with something more scathing. Not right now.

Her foot still smarted, after all. It rather disrupted her concentration, considering its implications.

She would have loved to talk about this with her friends. Asking them for advice, or just being there as moral support, would have been pretty great. But it was not to be: any mention of this kind of a matter would evoke uncomfortable questions that she could not answer. So she did not bring them up at all.

It was a good thing text was so easy to mask one's true emotions behind. And wearing a wig and some face paint helped to her mood as well. Somewhat.

* * *

His flesh tasted sweet.

He wondered if it was because he liked all the meat, or if something about really getting under the skin of his sister added to it. Oh, he knew he was making progress. She was lying about everything, as usual. Lying bitch.

The foot of the sarswapagus was painted candy-red, as was his mouth and his cheeks. He tasted the iron, savoured on it, though he made sure to not cut too deep. Nothing that would not take more time than a week or so to heal, or cripple them permanently. Not yet. It was far too early for that. Also, it hurt like a motherfucker.

Perhaps he had gone a bit too far this time. Struck an artery. Lot of blood. The first time around, it was just simple sting for him - though not for her - and it was easy to sleep. But now it was getting through him as well, bothering his rest. Ow. Sonuvabitch.

Oh, no matter. It seemed like he was about to pass out anyway. Blood loss. Too much. Going into shock. Bit a bit too deep... got too excited... goddammit.


	2. Check

Calliope screamed.

At first it was because of the dreams. Since her dreamself had died, not too long ago, the wonderful flying dreams of Prospit were replaced by something far, far more terrifying. That she knew what they were did not make things any easier to accept: if anything, it made them even more frightening and maddening.

But it quickly turned into a pathetic, pained wince, as her body woke up enough to realize that someone had been doing some damage while she was asleep, the nerve endings starting to reach her brain to tell her of this. Chain rattled as the leg was reflexively pulled close, hands clutching the deep gash, bleeding lime green all over the hitherto pure red.

By the time she started to unchain herself, the fingers were slippery and mind passing out again, and she had to try four times before the shackle would finally get off. She lost her footing on the slippery blood and hurt her elbow on the floor pretty badly, hurrying to her renewed stash of medical supplies, which she had put on display next to the computer after his first stunt like this: she had assumed, correctly it would seem, that she would need them.

But they would not be enough for a wound this bad.

The bandages soaked through within seconds of her putting them on, and held barely none of the blood on the other side, or helped to heal the injury or comfort her mood in the slightest. Some parts of the gauze were thoroughly soiled with blood even before she could put them on. And any attempt to disinfect the wound would be entirely out of the question. It was getting harder and harder to work with her shaking hands, going cold from the blood loss.

She had been wrong. Her brother WAS mad. It was no secret he wished to end her life, of course, but to go to such lengths... to endanger his own body to get rid of her as well... no. He could not kill her this way without losing his own life. He would not go that far. He did not think it was worth getting killed himself. Fuck, she really was passing out... she was in the middle of her room, without her other chain. If she passed out here...

Is this what he wanted all along? She could not lose consciousness. She had to keep going. She had to stay up. She had to...

What did she have in her sylladex...? Worth a look. Perhaps she had stored something good in there, just in case? Perhaps... she could not remember.

There was something there. She did not remember what it was, or when she had put it there. There was a small jar. And a note... it did not look like she had written it... oh, right. It was her brother. It was him who had left these things here, not her. That's the way her modus worked. Silly.

She was becoming delirious - never could tolerate much pain, nowhere near as much as her brother - and had to really concentrate to be able to read what it said:

SOME TROLL STuFF.

YOu'RE A FuCKING JACKASS. BuT.

I DON'T WANT TO GO ALONG WITH YOu. NOT QUITE FuCKING WORTH IT.

Yeah, that seemed real legit. If she were not dying on the floor, she would not give it a second thought, but as things stood she was kind of running out of options. Perhaps this delirium was making her a little bit crazy in her own right.

She opened it. Inside, though it was mostly empty, there was a bit of ointment left in the bottom, enough for a couple fingertips maybe. If this was anywhere near the stuff she knew the troll Medictators had, then she knew it would be enough. That stuff was awesome. Could patch up anything, save lives.

Scooped it up on her index and middle fingers. Prepared to spread it over the injury. As she did so, she started to think about something. Something with this stuff, that she had forgotten. Couldn't remember it. Maybe it wasn't anything that impor-

"Augh!"

Oh, right. It fucking HURT.

Trolls. She liked them, but... damn.

But okay. She was... she did not feel like she was passing out anymore. This is good. Breath was returning. The wound... still hurt, it hurt like hell, especially with the ointment, but it no longer bled. She probably would be okay.

Nap time... no. No nap. Not here. Bad place for nap. Back to bed. Sarswapagus.

She managed to stumble herself somewhat upon the thing, and even place the shackle on her foot, before she finally allowed herself to lose consciousness.

* * *

When she woke up again, surprisingly, nothing much had changed. Her injury had not been disrupted, thankfully, and instead left to heal properly for now: it appeared that even a world-class idiot such as himself realized, barely, when he had gone just a little too far. She had recovered plenty of strength, and was set in a better position on the bed... sarswapagus. It did still hurt, though.

Calliope spent a couple minutes right where she lay, to gather strength and think what to do next, before she got up, unchained, and limped to her computer. Unsurprisingly, a bunch of messages was waiting for her.

undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

uu: SO I AM uGLY. SO FuCKING WHAT?

uu: YES IT APPLIES TO ME TOO. BuT THE THING IS.

uu: I DON'T FuCKING GIVE A SHIT.

uu: I AM WHAT I AM. I DON'T PuT ON A FACE PAINT AND HORNS.

uu: TO TRY AND CONVINCE MYSELF I'M SOMETHING ELSE.

uu: HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU. HOW ABSOLuTELY PATHETIC THAT SHIT IS? I MUST HAVE.

uu: ANYWAY.

uu: JUST WHERE DOES IT SAY. IN OuR GAME. "I CAN'T RIP MY LEG OFF TO FREE MYSELF FROM MY CHAINS."

uu: I'D LIKE YOu TO SHOW ME.

uu: WELL?

uu: I AM LOOKING THROuGH THE DOCuMENTS OF THE GAME. HMMMMMMMMMMM. CAN'T SEEM TO FIND IT.

uu: SO FIRST YOu TRY TO CONVINCE TO YOuRSELF I WOuLDN'T DO IT. TO WIN OuR GAME.

uu: THEN YOu CLAIM IT IS AGAINST THE RuLES? YOu REALLY ARE A COWARD.

uu: I SHOuLD HAVE KILLED YOu OFF SWEEPS AGO.

uu: FuCK THAT NOISE. TIME FOR ONE MORE REMINDER. MAYBE NOW YOu WILL REALIZE I AM NOT PLAYING ANY GAMES HERE.

uu: I MEAN. FuCK. I AM PLAYING GAMES.

uu: BuT YOu KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

undyingUmbrage [uu] ceased jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

uu: OW. FuCK.

uu: MAYBE THAT WAS A LITTLE BIT TOO MuCH. CAN STILL FEEL IT.

uu: BuT NO MATTER. I THINK THE POINT WAS FINALLY MADE. HuH?

uu: STILL THINK YOu CAN END THIS WITH BOTH OF uS ALIVE?

uu: COOPERATE OuR WAY THROuGH SBuRB?

uu: FuCK THAT. I'VE TOLD YOu BEFORE.

uu: I PLAY TO WIN. AND I WILL WIN.

uu: YOu'RE A COWARD THAT CAN'T EVER ACCEPT THE REALITY.

uu: JuST LIKE YOu CAN'T ACCEPT THAT YOu'RE A CHERuB. INSTEAD SPENDING YOuR DAYS PRETENDING YOu'RE NOT.

uu: WELL. FuCK THAT. IT'S OVER.

uu: KILL ME!

uu: OR I.

uu: SHALL KILL YOu!

undyingUmbrage [uu] ceased jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

Fuck cheering. She was furious. And far more scared than she would have wished to admit.

uu: have yoU gone completely oUt of yoUr mind?

uu: yoU nearly killed Us both!

uu: yoU're a horrible person, and so very overboard with this shit right now. i can't even.

uu: bUt okay. i'll give it to yoU. yoU can withstand a lot of pain, and yoU just might be bUll-headed and daft enoUgh to bite yoUr own leg off.

uu: so i'm just asking. is there anything, anything at all, i coUld tell yoU to change yoUr mind? convince yoU that this really isn't the kind of a game we might want to play together?

uu: or maybe yoU're just messing with me? okay, fine. yoU got me. i am messed up. and i will most definitely not cUt off my own leg. yoUr plan is a sUccess. yoU win. it's a good game we had!

uu: can we jUst go back to chess or something now? maybe something entirely different? if yoU have ideas, i woUld be happy to consider them.

uu: make believe time is over. okay?

uranianUmbra [UU] ceased cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

Almost immediately after the messages were sent, Calliope regretted them. Showing weakness to her brother would never end up well for her. But even now, calming down a little, she had absolutely no idea how she could get out of this situation, without showing weakness, being defeated, or doing precisely what she was being dared to do.

Her eyes briefly glanced at the rusty instrument of murderpuzzles, lying against the wall. It made her shudder.

But as much as she wished it was not the case, that it was just an utterly retarded notion that would never happen, the thought was really starting to make sense to her. If she just prepared herself well, get some more of that Medictator Grubsauce Seasoning, she could do the deed and patch up the wound before bleeding out. She could then go to her brother's side, grab his juju and anything else of particular note or interest, and... yes, she would not even need to kill him! She could force him to work for her, blackmail him to play the game properly... he could not chew out the other foot anymore, at least not for a long time, until he finished up another of those artificial legs... yes.

No.

Absolutely not. She couldn't do this. The very idea was revolting. She would just have to convince her brother to leave the whole stupid case behind. Hopefully admitting defeat and that he had succeeded in scaring her was enough, instead of just convincing him to go through it all the more. She did not feel like the odds were well in the favor of the former.

She found herself shaking. That was not good. She could not remember being this terrified before in her life, except perhaps just after her dreamself had died. She had to do something.

Finally, all she managed was to open another pesterlog. For a long time, even saying two words was something she could not bring herself to do.

* * *

uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

TG: oh hi thar! :D

TG: been a whlie since we talked the last tiem

TG: *while

TG: *item

TG: w/e

TG: so whats up

TG: ...

TG: helloooo? u there?

TG: ummm

TG: idk maybe u opend a chat by mistake?

TG: can you hear me?

TG: i have this pling noise that goes of when some1 posts me

TG: you got something like that mayb

UU: hold me.

TG: oh there u are!

TG: um

TG: wat

UU: nothing, jUst, please. i have had an exceedingly bad couple days, and i do not know how mUch longer i can take this. u_u

TG: oh

TG: tis ur brother again?

UU: 'tis definitely my brother. bUt i don't want to talk aboUt it. i really, really don't feel like talking aboUt it.

TG: k

TG: uhm

TG: *hugs*

TG: is this ok?

UU: yes. it is perfect.

UU: thank yoU. i knew i coUld coUnt on yoU when it mattered.

TG: ur wellcome! :D

TG: its wut firends are for

TG: *frends

TG: whatevs ill just shut up now

TG: *hugs moar*

Calliope often enjoyed pretend. It was the one sort of a game she loved while her brother didn't. For the most part, it amounted to pretending she was a troll: wearing horns and a hairpiece, some face paint and gloves, strolling around like that and creating herself a trollsona... it was always a good amount of fun, and naturally she had her full makeup on at the moment, too, if only to try and distant her mind from the troubles and laments she was going through at the moment.

But this was also the first time she was pretending to hug someone.

She pretended, as hard as she could, that there was a warm cuddly human girl wrapped in her arms, comforting her with her presence and whispered words of calm, telling her it was all going to be all right and she was never going to abandon her. She had her eyes closed and own arms tight around her body to maintain the image. And it worked... a little bit. She was still shaking, and she would have cried if her species was capable of such... but the mere presence of another person, even if only through pesterlogs, was enough to actually successfully cheer her up a little, keep her from falling into true despair.

Perhaps it would have helped even more had she known that Roxy was doing the exact same thing. Pretending to hug, holding herself, and whispering words. Words which the cherub soon found on the screen:

TG: sshhh

TG: its okay

TG: im here for you

TG: its okay


	3. Checkmate

She made a feeble scan through her options, possible counterplans, and any alternatives for going through with this that ended with her triumphant or at least still in the game. She found none: with them sharing a body, it was next to impossible to influence her brother in the waking world, at least without playing his stupid game - and since her dreamself had died it had become even more unlikely to affect on anything in that front.

Her human friends could not help, even if she were willing to break all the rules of their games, and she was not. She was alone in this.

That night, Calliope went to sleep feeling no better, the nameless fear having been friefly banished but returning with newfound strength as she prepared for rest. Her right foot was still aching, and she was in no pretense that upon her waking up, it would hurt all the more. She knew her brother far too well to dare to feel hopeful about her showing a moment of weakness for him.

Frankly, it probably had just sealed her fate. For the short time until he ended this stupid charade of a game - and he _would_ end it, she had no doubts about it anymore - she would never live it down. She was an idiot.

And she could not catch sleep. Her unhappy thoughts and the pain in her leg were conspiring her to stay awake, regardless of how tired she was. Eventually, after a long time, she just gave up and called her brother by his name:

"Caliborn."

There was no better way to receive instant rest. Her consciousness snapped out before she could even realize it happening, as it always did when she called him by the name, throwing her to the other realm of dreams, bubbles, and horrifying creatures.

Her dreams were no more pleasant than her waking had been. The Furthest Ring gave her no respite: they were begging for help, for her to save them from an indestructible demon, a beast that was slaughtering them. She did not know what they meant: even if some of her friends could have told her that she knew many things, even everything, her knowledge in fact amounted to woefully little. She told them she could not offer aid. What could she do for them if she could not even help herself? How could she stand in front of such a monster?

They told her that she must.

But before they could explain to her with anything of more substance than cryptic references and riddles, she woke up. She heard her name being spoken - "Calliope" - and she could not stop herself from returning to the world of the living, to the world of pain.

This time there had been no need for him to make a new cut. All he had to do was to open the old one a little bit. It was not as bad as it had been at one point, did not bleed as horribly and hurt less, but it bothered her all the same.

She felt numb as she treated and tied it. For a fleeting moment, all the terror had left her body, replaced with just... just mechanical actions and thoughts, brief dull peace, even serenity, calm in the middle of the storm of her mind.

Calliope might have hoped some messages from humans, though they very rarely contacted her, and was indeed disappointed. There was, however, a message from her brother:

undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

uu: OH BOO HOO HOO. "I GIVE uP, PLEASE HAVE MERCY ON ME."

uu: YOu DISGuST ME, YOu KNOW THAT? LIKE. YOu REALLY REALLY REPuLSE ME.

uu: THIS IS HOW LOW YOu'VE FALLEN. YOu'RE ONE STEP FROM DEFEAT. AND ASKING ME TO NOT TAKE THAT STEP. *BEGGING* ME NOT TO.

uu: OH NO.

uu: FUCK THAT. WE ARE IN *THE SHIT* NOW.

uu: TOGETHER. FOR THE LONG HAUL.

uu: WE ARE MOTHERFuCKIN ENTRENCHED IN THIS BITCH.

uu: MATE IN ONE. THERE WAS NEVER ANYTHING YOu COuLD TELL ME TO NOT TAKE MY VICTORY IN A GAME WHEN IT WAS WITHIN MY GRASP.

uu: YOu HAVE LIVED YOuR LIFE BEING A WEAKLING AND A DISGRACEFUL CuNTBAG WHO DOES NOT HAVE THE GuTS TO TAKE THE STEPS REQUIRED FOR VICTORY. AND BEGS THE OTHERS TO BE AS WEAK AS HER.

uu: NOW LET'S SEE HOW WELL YOu CAN KEEP YOuR SHIT TOGETHER WHEN YOu FINALLY LOSE FOR GOOD.

uu: MAYBE I SHOuLD WEAR ONE OF THOSE HuMAN BABY DIAPERS WHEN I GO TO SLEEP TO PREPARE FOR YOu SOILING OuR PRECIOUS BODY?

uu: HAA HAA HOO HOO.

undyingUmbrage [uu] ceased jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

She stared at the words in front of her. It was largely what she had predicted: more taunting and, well, jeering. It did not make her any more afraid, though. She had not fallen quite so far as to be frightened by curses and insults. Slightly more agitated, perhaps.

And definitely angry.

uranianUmbra [UU] began cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

UU: ENOUGH!

UU: just shUt the fUck Up already!

UU: i'm almost looking forward to yoU doing this thing becaUse even having my leg chewed off is going to be more pleasant than listening to yoUr endless shite!

UU: bUt actually, fUck that noise.

UU: yoU want me to come over there so badly? watch me!

UU: by the time yoU read this, yoU'll be missing a leg!

UU: and yoUr jUjU.

UU: but yoU *will* wake Up. Unlike i woUld've. becaUse i still want to play the game.

UU: this way i'll jUst make sUre that yoU will play it properly.

UU: i've had enoUgh of yoUr shit for good.

uranianUmbra [UU] ceased cheering undyingUmbrage [uu]

* * *

Acquiring some additional medical supplies, including the Grubsauce Seasoning, was easy enough. Getting a new saw, though, was not: Calliope had to settle with the old rusty one she had gotten from her brother, which frankly still intimidated her a little.

She had the bandages, and some disinfectant. She had a cloth tightly wrapped around her leg to cut off circulation and prevent blood loss. She had sat down on the sarswapagus and shackled the other foot, in case she would pass out in pain. She wished she had painkillers: really, it was as if the universe itself was trying to make this as unpleasant for her as possible.

Same as her face, she was quite thin everywhere else, with not much flesh around her bones, and her shin was no exception. That was a... good thing, right? She was no expert in these matters, but it meant there was less to cut through? Not that this was not going to be a long, painful night, regardless, but any bit off of it would make it a little easier at least.

Blimey, her mind was rambling...

The tooth felt cold and sharp against bare skin, as it was probably supposed to. It brought a lump to her throat and made her sweat, both from zero to hundred as soon as it had made contact. This was going against all of her most basic instincts, about survival and self-preservation and trying to not bring harm to herself. It would by no means be easy.

She tried to swallow the lump. It would not go. The burning anger she had felt moments before had left her body, replaced by emptiness, a cold dead void. Once again her emotions had gotten the better of her: she had made promises and threats, and she would now have to reap what she had sown.

But, she thought about it, there really was no other way this could end anymore. Other than her own cowardice and death, which she would still try her best to avoid. She would not, never would, go gentle into the night: that was the one promise she had made to herself when the games with her brother began.

She brought the shackled foot closer to her, and took a firm hold of the saw, gritting her teeth. No more stalling. She was doing this. She was making it happen.

Now, if only the bloody saw stopped to shake so much, or send chills down her spine with every touch it made against her flesh.

Okay. Deep breath. She could do this. She had to. Just... more breaths, inhale, exhale. Tried to calm down and stop the shaking. But it was slower going than she would have liked. She had to put the saw down and wipe her hand from sweat, then pick it back up again.

It drew a drop of blood the second time she pressed it against her. Even this stung more than she would have liked, and painted a very ugly picture for her that did not at all prepare her for the grim task ahead of her. It also did not help that her mind would insist on thinking about all the worst possible things to think about in this kind of a situation, such as where the hell has that saw been and how did it get that rusty?

Knowing her brother, it was something worse than she could even think.

She began to tremble again, just thinking about that. Not good. She was having far too many second thoughts about going through the act already. Fuck... she couldn't stop now, she would never live it down - even if her brother decided to not finish her off immediately afterwards, which he would most certainly do. She had to go on.

But she could not.

No... another deep breath later, the saw was removed from her leg. She couldn't do it. Fuck.

Calliope laughed bitterly, a sound coarse and raspy straight from her throat, that would have brought along with it tears were she really a troll or even human. Of _course_ she could not do it: her brother would not dare her, call her a coward, bang down all her buttons repeatedly, if he had not been absolutely sure that she could not do it in the end. He was much smarter than that.

Something snapped in her head. As she laughed, the pained and miserable giggle slowly picked up strength, losing the rasp and the fatigue and becoming something greater, something far more insane. From a mad cackle it grew into a true laughter of one that had just lost her mind, out of the absurdity of it all, at least very briefly, echoing across their room for several seconds.

It reminded her of her brother's.

In her head, the first snap was joined by another. The laughter, a sign of madness, turned into an all-too sane scream of comprehending wrath and all-encompassing rage. Even in the middle of yelling her lungs out, her throat soring out and her requiring breath, before she could think about it any more, have any doubts or second thoughts, the saw was once again pressed hard against her shin.

Green blood spurted from the fresh wound as the rusty thing was harshly pulled from left to right.

The scream of anger turned, partly, into that of pain. But only partly. Its wielder grit her teeth together and grunted through them, pulling her instument back to the left and deepening the wound the same time, emphasizing the pain and bringing it back to the top of her consciousness. Lesser wound than the one on her other leg it may still be, but it was regardless infinitely worse because of its undeniably self-inflicted nature.

The third stroke evoked a powerful shudder that ran through her entire body, making her tremble, but though it added to her pain, it was not enough to make her drop the saw. The fourth, back to the left, began to blur her vision, make her sway and not see clearly anymore, apart from the green blood which was as distinct as ever in her eyes. Very distinct indeed: it was everywhere, coating the saw and the sarswapagus and her leg.

She no longer had the strength to push the rusted weapon deep into the wound, more and more of her concentrating on simply staying conscious throughout the ordeal, to not give in to shock. There was not even enough left to count the strokes from left to right, right to left. Going through the bone was slow enough as it is, the steel being only barely sharp enough to cut it at all.

Her scream had quieted down and become something akin to a low moan, or groan, just as her body had dulled out to much of the pain and agony and her rage had died out to simple determination to see this through. The feelings and emotions, both physical and mental, simplified themselves to nothing but vast, alternating carpets of freezing cold, like half of her was immersed into a glacier - and searing heat, as if the other half was dipped to the vast red giant right outside the planet.

How long was she doing it? How long did this woeful, painful task take for her? She did not know even this: she lost the track of time entirely, and it could have anything between five minutes and half an hour. Or two seconds and a billion years.

How could she even have known when it ended? She could not: the sudden jolt her hands felt as the saw went further down through nothing but air did not bring her back to consciousness, but the scraping screech of it trying to continue through the cold metal she was sitting on was enough, if only barely.

The foot, and the shackle it was attached on, fell down to the ground along with the saw, as Calliope, even then mechanical and barely conscious, yet simultaneously fast and fumbling, felt for the troll jar next to her. Blood was streaming out of her fast, taking along with it the last piece of life force she had left: her first true thought, instead of action, was that she had to work quickly.

Three fingers scooped up a large clump of the ointment and unceremoniously dumped it to the wound, spreading it all over the stump, ignoring the fire it made her feel - barely adding to the whirlwind of agony going through her leg already. And with that, the Alternian technology powerful enough to stop even such a vast gush of bleeding, it was done. She had really done it.

The young cherub turned to her side, facing the floor on one side of the sarswapagus, and promptly threw up.

* * *

Had she lost consciousness? She wasn't sure. It was certainly possible, but considering she was still lying on the same place, the same position, with a pool of blood next to her and staring right into another, rather smaller, pool of half-digested alien food, it was probably just a second or two, not enough for her brother to do anything - but more than enough for him to comprehend his ultimate defeat.

Even as she tried to fight through the pain that still lingered in her leg, brave through the fatigue and exhaustion in the rest of her body, and cough and spit the hot filth still remaining in her mouth, Calliope felt something entirely new, something swelling and bursting in her chest, something not searing hot but just pleasantly warm:

She felt proud.

She had gone through the worst shit in her life and emerged triumphant, for once undeniably victorious over him. Their game was over, and she stood tall. She dared to smile once again, for the first time since her chat with Roxy. She would have to tell her about this immediately. Right after gloating to her brother a little: she thought she had deserved that much.

She unhooked the other chain and stepped up, tripping on the way to her brother's side of the room because she put her weight on the wrong foot, having not quite internalized its absence yet. This was an entirely new ground for her, and she felt undeniably excited about it. Her brother's side was a mess, food and weaponry littered about uncaringly, even his juju chest tossed carelessly into the corner and half-covered with junk. That thing was her very third priority.

She sat down on the chair in front of the computer, similar to hers but dark red, and took some deep breaths. Even getting this far had exhausted her briefly, considering her recent trials. She opened the computer, but before she could leave any messages to anyone, she saw something else that caught her interest.

Someone had left him messages during the past few hours, and it was mostly a brief curiousity that led her to click them:

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began bothering undyingUmbrage [uu]

TG: heeeeey

TG: k first of all ur a dick

TG: lets jsut put the fact here on the table where we can both see it

TG: like

TG: youre the worst

TG: u keep on msesin with my friend

TG: so okay when ur back here anyway

TG: i got a msg for you from ur sis

TG: it goes like this

TG: CALLIOPE

TG: WAKE UP

TG: did i spell that right

TG: u there UU?

uu: YES, YOu GOT IT JuST FINE. WELL DONE, ROXY!

uu: uH. HOLD ON.

TG: :DDD

uu: BuGGER, THERE'S NO CAPS LOCK. HE HAS JUST TORN IT OFF. SO TYPICAL OF HIM.

In the end, being unable to turn the caps off, she just decided to hold down shift key for the most part, even if this task turned out to be more exerting for her than she might have imagined, again because she was pretty much spent.

undyingUmbrage [uu] changed his chumhandle to uranianUmbra [UU]

TG: there you are! had a good nap?

TG: prolly not

TG: sry i took this long

TG: : (

UU: what are yoU talking aboUt, love? we jUst talked yesterday, and everything was... well, okay, it wasn't qUite fine, but yoU certainly did not take long.

UU: my brother was not here at all. i got on this compUter all on my own! ^u^

UU: it was pretty horrible, mind. i am thankfUl that you are here already. it is good to talk to someone pleasant and friendly.

UU: you have no idea how mUch it means to me. thank yoU.

TG: ur welcome

TG: but uh

UU: i think i will be fine now. i'll go back to my side with his jUjU and, thoUgh i do not like the idea, blackmail him into playing nicely with me.

UU: there is nothing he can do anymore. he has lost.

UU: yoU know, i cannot even remember ever giving yoU my name. bUt i sUppose the dreadfUl circumstances yesterday led to sUch, no? it is the blood loss that does that to my memory.

TG: ...

UU: oh! don't worry aboUt that. it's just a, Uh, flesh woUnd. it will heal with time, and i will be good as new!

TG: thats not what i meant

TG: i uh

TG: oh fcuk

UU: what? is something wrong?

TG: im sorry

TG: im so srory i thought you already knew

UU: knew what? tell me. what is wrong, roxy?

TG: um

TG: i have very very bad news


	4. Post-Mortem

Deep within the darkness of the Paradox Space, beyond any universe or smaller sphere or bubble of reality, there loomed an ancient and powerful creature. It floated still, pondering, its cyclopean body quivering as it thought thoughts so vast and alien that any mortal creature hearing them would risk being reduced to a gibbering mess, its multitude of three-lobed eyes affixed to a particular universe far away... a universe with what it had worked for a long time, slowly and cautiously nudging ahead the minds of a particular people living there, leading them to their own destruction and that of their entire creation...

An eye blinked and turned away to a far more nearby location, spotting a glowing spirograph entering into the existence, signifying a long-scale time-space entrance of some particular creature. As it realized what was coming through, the nature of the lone wanderer whose ship sailed the dark waters of the void, it swiftly forgot all it was doing and fled the scene, akin to an octopus swimming away in the presence of a shark. Minus the ink cloud.

The vessel did not give chase. Sometimes it did, when it was bored, but this time around it simply did not feel like bothering. It had another destination.

Although its gliding past might have seemed slow and leisurely to any mortal eye observing it, it was, due to the way the Paradox Space worked sometimes, in fact extremely fast, appearing to have barely passed the location of the God that had been in this spot mere seconds earlier, yet in reality it was already trillions of miles away. It approached a sphere, a glowing bubble in the middle of endless black, and slowly, unhurriedly, entered.

It had all the time in the universe.

As it landed in the middle of the dream bubble, and the sarcophagus opened slowly to reveal a light from beyond the stars, reforming itself into an overcoat around a vast, monstrous creature, observing its surroundings with glowing eyes blinking in every color, the unfortunate inhabitants stared back, and looked at each other in an agitated realization, asking out loud questions in roughly the same order: can we fight him? Can he even kill us, when we're already dead? Can we run away?

He lifted his hand, and opened his mouth, and all three questions received an answer, wordlessly, at once. Then there was nothing but light, blinding to any creature lesser than himself, and then nothingness.

Quintillions of years old he may be, there were some things Lord English would never get bored of, and things he did not feel like hurrying through. He had not forgotten how to savour the moment. Eternity itself may have been be like a blink of an eye for him, human lifetimes inconsequential, entire universes croaking into life and fading away in brief moments... but the briefest moments of all, the faces and screams of terror, were some of the most delicious to him. And there was one in particular he was waiting for.

Every time his hand brushed his left leg, he remembered. Every time he remembered, he smiled.

* * *

undyingUmbrage [uu] began jeering uranianUmbra [UU]

uu: HuH. OH DEAR, NOW I'M SCARED. MAYBE I PuSHED YOu A BIT TOO FAR THIS TIME, "SISTER."

uu: HOLD ON LET ME COuNT THE LEGS.

uu: ONE.

uu: uH. WHAT WAS THE NuMBER. OH RIGHT!

uu: TWO. TWO LEGS.

uu: HMMMMMMMMMMM.

uu: WHAT WAS THAT YOu SAID? YOu WOuLD COME HERE? I DON'T SEE YOu.

uu: HEE HEE HEE HEE.

uu: IT WOuLD SEEM YOu CHICKENED AWAY FROM IT IN THE END AFTER ALL. JuST LIKE I THOUGHT.

uu: I THINK I WILL SPARE THE LEG. FOR NOW. THAT WAS NEVER THE POINT OF THIS GAME ANYWAY.

uu: THE POINT WAS. TO LET YOu KNOW FOR SuRE. WHICH ONE OF uS WAS BETTER. WHICH ONE OF uS WOuLD WIN.

uu: WELL WE BOTH KNOW IT NOW. RIGHT?

uu: HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA. HAA!

uu: ALSO. TO FuCK YOu uP PROPERLY.

uu: DID I TELL YOu SOMETHING ABOuT DREAM BuBBLES? I HAVE THIS THEORY. MAYBE YOu'LL LIKE IT.

* * *

Most mortals would never truly realize they had been dead all along. They would spend the eternity within the afterlife reliving their memories from the time of their living, going through everything once again, over and over, never really remembering them, usually the exact same way they had when they were alive.

Usually.

Caliborn had theorized, and as Lord English later confirmed, that certain memories would pop up more often than others. The most powerful, the happiest, and the most traumatic memories: most players of Schrub (as his "sister" used to call the game) would remember their time within the game, on their planet and either Prospit or Derse, as well as Skaia itself, for much of the time. This is why most of the dream bubbles he had gone through contained precisely such memories: he even recognized some of his own.

Of course, Calliope never had had the time to enter the game, so these were never an option for her. She would live through her time in their room, where they spent much of his childhood, and her entire life.

And that was not even the best part. The best part, he thought, was what would happen if someone were to ever break the illusion, inform a soul that they were dead. What would happen, slightly before this point, was the eternal dream of the afterlife reacting to the intrusion, shaping itself slightly around it, changing the memory, slightly altering it in respect to how it had originally gone.

* * *

uu: I THINK WE BOTH KNOW. WHAT WILL HAPPEN.

uu: MuCH LATER IN THE FuTuRE.

uu: LIKE.

uu: ZILLIONS OF YEARS. OR SOMETHING.

uu: YOuR FRIENDS WILL FIND YOu. JuST BEFORE I DO.

uu: AND JuST BEFORE THEY DO. YOu REMEMBER THIS DAY. EXCEPT SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT.

uu: HOW WILL IT BE DIFFERENT? I THINK YOu KNOW. DON'T YOu?

uu: HAA. HAA.

* * *

She had never responded to that. In fact, she had not talked to him for a week after it, only breaking the silence at the very end of their charade. But he knew that she agreed to it, that he was right. And he knew she did not like this one bit.

He was coming for her. And because he did care for her, he had arranged that she would know when it was close to happening. She would know when the time was close for her final destruction, and that of her friends and everything she had ever cared for. And this time, though he enjoyed the very smallest and most fleeting moments, he would make this one count. Last a bit longer.

Every time his hand brushed his left leg, he remembered. And he knew that she would remember, too. Forever. He had made sure of it.

He touched the small scar still on his shin, the testament of her last true attempt to put up a fight, and the field of her final defeat.


End file.
